Wednesday, May 20, 2009

All That Glitters

Sure, I get it. Vampires are sexy. They're creatures of the night. Dark. Brooding. Mysterious. Dangerous. Sparkly, in certain cases.

I'm thinking sexy was what HBO was going for with this:

Except that the way this photograph was shot, composited, photoshopped whatever - it looks like Mr. Vampire is drooling all over the chick from Fly Away Home's clavicle. Bite marks can be sexy. Lolling tongues on the other hand, not so much.

Also, I'm not sure song titles from John [Cougar] Mellencamp's catalogue make for the hottest taglines, either.

And why does that True Blood logo look like it was created with nine different fonts? Could the art director really not experiment with The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog and just pick one? I feel like vampires are nothing if not focused, art director, and the schizo lettering is definitely not giving me that.

On the other hand, something like this...

...actually, never mind. Those facial expressions and that unsubtle muscle-squeezing negate any sort of atmosphere or ambiance the art director was able to create with a fog machine and his bold embrace of the sepia tool. Way to go, Kristen Stewart.


  1. What a sick masochistic lion...

  2. And don't forget the supposedly visible patch of chest hair on Edward. Hahahaha. I almost cried when I read that.

  3. Oh my god, the first thing I noticed in that billboard was the horrible font. What were they thinking?? Perhaps they were trying to make my eyes bleed as a tie-in to the show's theme? In that case, well-played HBO.